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媽媽手記：讓自然結(jié)果教育孩子事倍功倍

出處：媽媽育兒網(wǎng)日期：2013-09-30 10:44:13編輯：Chen

每每和媽媽們談到孩子的教育問(wèn)題，媽媽們都能嘮叨半天，到最后一個(gè)個(gè)都唉聲嘆氣。媽媽們所煩惱的問(wèn)題也無(wú)非就是孩子不愛(ài)吃飯，孩子不認(rèn)真學(xué)習(xí)，孩子不聽(tīng)話，總是愛(ài)和自己唱反調(diào)。

為什么孩子不聽(tīng)話，為什么孩子會(huì)叛逆，究竟怎么做，孩子才能成為父母心中的好孩子？事實(shí)告訴我們，真正懂教育的父母，不會(huì)對(duì)孩子言聽(tīng)計(jì)從，更不會(huì)什么事都一手包辦，選擇自然結(jié)果教育孩子，才能事半功倍。

從對(duì)教育的理解和家長(zhǎng)對(duì)孩子的管理強(qiáng)度來(lái)看，家長(zhǎng)可以分為三種：

第一種就是既懂教育，又對(duì)孩子很用心的人；

第二種是不懂教育，但是對(duì)孩子很用心的人；

第三種是不懂教育，但也不太管孩子的人。

這三種家長(zhǎng)里面，第一類家長(zhǎng)是最好的。

懂教育，管理基本上都是合乎教育學(xué)原則的，肯定會(huì)培養(yǎng)出不錯(cuò)的孩子；第三種次之，一個(gè)家長(zhǎng)，可以不懂教育，但是如果減少對(duì)孩子的胡亂的干涉，把很多的自由交給孩子的話，你的孩子多半會(huì)成長(zhǎng)得非常好——請(qǐng)我們回想一下我們自己的成長(zhǎng)，我們的父母?jìng)円矝](méi)有文化，但是我們那個(gè)年代，也會(huì)產(chǎn)生出很多優(yōu)秀的人才。因?yàn)槟菚r(shí)的家長(zhǎng)恰恰契合了給孩子自由這樣一個(gè)最根本的原則。

第二種家長(zhǎng)，即不懂教育，但是對(duì)孩子很用心，破壞力是最大的。

令人擔(dān)憂的是現(xiàn)在我們社會(huì)上充滿了第二類家長(zhǎng)。這些家長(zhǎng)，他們文化程度有的高有的低，但對(duì)教育的理解都不是很深刻，對(duì)孩子管理特別細(xì)，孩子的各方面、每個(gè)生活小細(xì)節(jié)都會(huì)關(guān)照到，但由于他們的行為不符合教育學(xué)原則，越管得多，越用心，情況越糟糕，破壞越大。

來(lái)找我咨詢的家長(zhǎng)，多半他們的孩子已產(chǎn)生了非常嚴(yán)重的心理障礙，問(wèn)題已經(jīng)非常多了。他們基本上都屬于第二類家長(zhǎng)。這些家長(zhǎng)的共同特點(diǎn)往往都是自身非常強(qiáng)勢(shì)，至少父親一方特別能干，或者是媽媽一方能干，大多數(shù)情況下是父母雙方都非常能干，學(xué)歷及收入都不低。

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