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聽勸！夫妻關(guān)系再好，也不要輕易為男人做這3件事

出處：@大果小果媽媽日期：2024-06-26 10:37:09編輯：網(wǎng)絡(luò)收集

結(jié)婚，只需要一時(shí)的勇氣，但守護(hù)一場婚姻，卻需要一輩子的努力，更需要時(shí)時(shí)刻刻的智慧。

對婚姻中的女人來說，不想把自己折騰得面目全非，哪怕夫妻關(guān)系再好，也永遠(yuǎn)別幫對方做這3件事。

不是自私，而是經(jīng)營婚姻的智慧。

01

感情再好，也別輕易不要彩禮

關(guān)于結(jié)婚要不要彩禮，討論很火熱。

有人問：“結(jié)婚時(shí)，女方為什么不能不要彩禮？”

有一個(gè)回答很贊：“女孩子要得并不是彩禮，而是一份尊重。”

女兒出嫁，父母要彩禮，無非是希望男方以及男方的家庭明白，婚姻是需要有所付出的，也是需要有所擔(dān)當(dāng)?shù)摹?/p>

在彩禮話題下，就有位姑娘分享了自己的故事：

和男友是自由戀愛，到談婚論嫁的時(shí)候，根據(jù)習(xí)俗提彩禮，男方家認(rèn)為彩禮不過是走個(gè)過程，沒必要這么麻煩；

女孩聽男友的話，轉(zhuǎn)頭就跟父母說兩人感情好，彩禮什么的老套形式就不要了吧，盡管父母不樂意，但拗不過女兒，最終妥協(xié)了。

結(jié)婚后，姑娘又要工作又要照顧家庭，結(jié)果因?yàn)楹推牌庞齼河^念不合拌嘴，被婆婆指著鼻子罵：“你個(gè)便宜貨，要不是你上趕著嫁給我兒子，我家看不上！”

姑娘憤怒又委屈，和老公訴說，沒想到曾經(jīng)甜言蜜語的男人，也在指責(zé)她不懂事，不知道讓著老人。

就是那一刻，姑娘說她有了離婚的念頭。

彩禮，雖然不能和婚姻是否幸福直接掛鉤，但不可否認(rèn)的是，婚姻的真相，一半說愛，一半談錢。

婚后，柴米油鹽醬醋茶的生活，有情并不能飲水飽。

02

婆家的事情，永遠(yuǎn)不要沖到老公前面

感情再好，也別不把自己當(dāng)外人，婆家的事兒，永遠(yuǎn)不要沖在老公前面，否則吃力不討好，委屈無人理。

小美的老公大鵬是家里幾兄弟姐妹中唯一讀了大學(xué)的人，其他兄弟姐妹自從得知他們準(zhǔn)備在長沙買房，覺得有錢，就開始跑來借錢。

大鵬礙于情面不好拒絕，便說小美掌控家庭財(cái)政大權(quán)。

小美想著現(xiàn)在首付還差一辦，一時(shí)半會(huì)也買不起，老公家那邊姊妹有急用，又是這么親的親人，于是跟老公說借吧。老公也沒反對。

這筆錢一借就是三四年，小美從來沒催促過，后來長沙放開限購，貸款利率也比較低，小美想著是個(gè)上車的好機(jī)會(huì)，于是和老公商量把錢要回來。

沒想到，老公竟然說當(dāng)初這錢是她借出去的，現(xiàn)在該自己去要回來；

婆婆也在旁邊附和“幾萬塊的事，你也好意思催嗎？你一個(gè)外人，別把他們兄弟姊妹幾個(gè)的關(guān)系搞差了！”

看看，當(dāng)初自己替老公出面當(dāng)好人，現(xiàn)在弄得里外不是人，還得了一個(gè)小氣的名聲！

女人是感性的動(dòng)物，很容易愛屋及烏。

但聰明的女人，懂得把握好分寸感，守好自己的界限。

正如楊絳先生奉勸女人的忠告中所言：

“婚后做個(gè)聰明的女人，婆家的事，記住要裝瞎，做到不聞、不問、不聽、不看，你會(huì)快樂很多，任何事情，讓他們自己去解決。記住你是你，他們是他們，別太把自己當(dāng)回事。”

千萬聽勸，婆家的事，永遠(yuǎn)不要沖到老公前面。

03

不要用自己父母的錢，去解決婆家的事

俗話說，斗米恩升米仇。

你可以用你自己和丈夫的錢去解決婆家的事，但千萬不要爛好心，用父母的錢去解決婆家的事，父母的錢是父母的。

一網(wǎng)友分享自己的經(jīng)歷，真的是很現(xiàn)實(shí)。

“結(jié)婚8個(gè)月，以婆婆名義買的所謂的婚房交房了，婆婆興沖沖拉著我們?nèi)ナ辗?，嘴里不停念叨地段好，綠化也好，幼兒園也近，方便以后孩子讀書……

話鋒一轉(zhuǎn)，婆婆把目光轉(zhuǎn)向我，說就是裝修現(xiàn)在還需要錢？你們倆現(xiàn)在也沒什么錢，要不你找你爸媽出點(diǎn)錢？反正以后這房子也是你們倆的。

我沒接這話，我又不傻，她的房子，憑什么要我娘家出錢裝修？”

姑娘確實(shí)挺清醒，畢竟誰的錢都不是大風(fēng)刮來的，更何況還是父母的錢。

遇到知書達(dá)理的婆家還好，至少會(huì)感念的好，但若遇到不講道理的人，轉(zhuǎn)頭就能翻臉不認(rèn)賬。

正如有人在知乎求助的那樣：“老公讓你找娘家借錢，認(rèn)為一切都是為了你，正常嗎？”

有網(wǎng)友站出來用親身經(jīng)歷訴說：不正常，非常不正常。

（故事我貼出來了，大家可以細(xì)看，真的是林子大了什么鳥都有）

在婚姻中，切記遵守這一條原則，不為婆家拖累娘家。

結(jié)語

有句話是這么說的：“至高至明日月，至親至疏夫妻。”

似乎是在勸解世人，夫妻關(guān)系再好，也是兩個(gè)獨(dú)立的個(gè)體，既要相互扶持，又要在共存中保持清醒。

以上3件事，再親密也別輕易做。

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